Memorial Day

“I love you baby doll.”  “You make the sun shine on such a rainy ole day.”  “I just need to see your smile.”  “Good morning sweetheart.”


I miss you so very much and I love you dad.

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If you look, you will find me.

Stop running, just lay,

and you will find me.

Listen, and you will hear.

Me whisper your name.

For I am the wind wrapped around you,

the trees that block the rain –

for you.

Just find me.

As your heart beats, so does mine,

as your mind wonders, so does mine.

Listen to your heart, follow the beat

feel the gentle earth, and the whispers of my breath.

For I am here.

I am the wind.

I am the trees.


Posted in Dating


The end is here.  I have to forget. 

 When I feel lonely – he must be forgotten. 

When I am feeling bad – he must get out of my mind. 

When I feel lost – I must turn my back to the East, and look towards the West and pray that I am found and realization is just a sunset away. 

Beauty lies within and when I feel ugly and discounted.  I must reach within and pull out the stars, the golden sun, the purity of sincerity and grasp the pretty flowers that blossom within and hold hope close to my heart.  Because I can only fulfill my journey– if the belief of the end can open a gate to my future.  A future of creativity. —-  To nurture another.  To self-sacrifice —- those are my true meanings. 

Love is like the wind, it must be felt – never seen.  And to have felt a love like ours was my miracle.  Mine to hold forever and reflect upon when hopelessness is yawning with the morning dew.  Angels DO appear and angels WILL reappear. 

Despair will slowly fade …… Promises are in the sunlight reflecting on the snow.  They are just shadows reminding me to appreciate my surroundings and to just stop  and to always smile.   

Thank you my angel.  Thank you for everything.


Posted in break ups, sadness | 1 Comment


Silence, is my killer.  It lurks like cancer.

I smell death.

The sounds.  Nature I carefully swaddle.

I hold on to synthetic comfort.  My heart is full, while my soul is empty.

Longing, searching for peace.

The cold air lurks.  Questions of tainted love, plague my mind.

The cancer is back.  Silence is my killer.

Once laughing, the ferris wheel turns.  High on life, once laughing — the wheel must stop.

Does everything come to an end?

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Men with baggage

Have you ever stared at men looking in a hole while holding shovels?  Yes, these are working “men”?  In their eyes, they are………. But they still hold baggage. 

Men with baggage carry their life in a suitcase that is entangled, causing prominent pain and severe walking problems.  This “baggage”  strangles their sense of commons, it restricts their blood flow to the brain, it also depletes them from an honest answer.  But they still hold their Samsonite —- closely to their genitals like jockey underwear and gold balm.  They have their pride. 

Ode to the bricks, load them one by one, stack them high and thick; inside that suitcase………. because you deserve every little piece of sand that brick possesses. 

I’ll just be out here enjoying life and breathing while imagining you straddling your baggage.

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Baby Steps

And he said, let’s take it slow……
Let’s slow dance in the living room,
while cars pass by, while the darkness lights our world.
Treat me gently, a fragile soul that’s lost.
Lost in love, lost in faith.
On the package it reads “Handle with care.”
Breathe and take care of me.
Like a newborn baby, our love is delicate.
Petals blowing in the wind, feathers soften our heads.
Our travels have been rough, lots of sadness
A lot of worries, so much that the world won.
He gave in to that “statistic.” 
Statistics that give statistics.
Good and bad.
I can’t choose either side.
For I am the queen of my universe.
Not society.  I never gave into them.
I never stopped believing in the dream.
The baby steps of life.  They will get us there.
Slowly and safely — we will defeat and prove
to one another that we persevere.
We matter and our joy will carry us, when our feet are weary.
So when you see one set of foot prints, please don’t give up.
One of us was carried, while the other kept the pace.
The pace of a perfect life.  The steps that got us there was worth
every move……………………… because love was our destiny.
Fate is our legacy.  Happiness is our reason.
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Smells like Christmas

The clouds above are covered with white linen.
Feathers of flakes fall upon my face,
Blankenting me with coolness, my hands break free.
I spin around and around in celebration of snow.
It’s here.
Mother Nature is painting her world.
Galileo is speaking.  Poe is rejoicing and falling in love with
The softness bestills my heart, and the air is magical.
It smells like Christmas.
Christmas feels like family, I want that smell.
Hands are as cold as our winter noses.  Eskimos kiss to stay warm.
Like Christmas.
I’m glad to meet you in the winter time, so our tracks can provide a
trail to follow, if we ever wish to go back home.
For Christmas.
I’d wrap you in a box and place a bow on top. Just to smell the pleasant aroma of Christmas.
Let me wrap my arms around you and place my bow on your lips. 
Christmas wouldn’t be right, without you and I opening up and sharing ourselves.
Come to Christmas………. and bring the snow.
See you there!
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